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- All that glitters is not gold – it’s vampire flesh.
- Forks aren’t just a type of utensil.
- If you hear a voice in your head, don’t worry. It’s only your vampire
sweetheart, warning you away from danger.
- Debussy is sexy.
- Don’t shoot wolves; they might be werewolves on the hunt for bloodthirsty vampires.
- Thunder isn’t just a feature of storms; it’s the sound of vampires playing baseball.
- Before cliff diving, notify any psychics you know that you intend to live afterward.
- There is no such thing as safe sex with a vampire.
- Lions and lambs were meant to be together. Lambs and wolves…not so much.
- Anyone who skips bloodtyping day in Biology class is probably a vampire.
- Ditto for anyone who drives a shiny, silver Volvo and speeds.
- Vampires have excellent taste in cars.
- There is nothing sexy about being a walking space heater. A walking air conditioner, on the other hand…
- Never vacation in Volterra, Italy.
- Gold eyes=vegetarian; approach with caution. Red eyes=carnivore; run like hell in other direction…not that it will do much good.
-Twilight is the saddest time of the day/night
- A new moon is the darkest part of anyone’s life.
- Piano players have very capable hands.
- Backcountry meadows are the perfect place for a first date.
- Stiletto heels and leg casts only mix if you have a vampire to help you walk.
- Sometimes smelling really good can be a really dangerous thing. But can be worth it.
- Perfection has tousled bronze hair, topaz eyes, pale skin, and venomous saliva.
- Boys in real life don’t compare to men in books.
- If a boy ever ignores you for no reason and gives you dirty looks like you are a demon probably mean that he is a vampire and you smell to good for your on good, and he wants you.
*I got these off of other websites they were funny... so don't get the Volturi mad at me*
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